JOURNAL ENTRIES FROM YEAR 2000
|It is now Dec 31st, 1999.|
am on my way to a few parties given by various friends. I have been
|January 1, 2000|
Wow! It is year 2000. I keep waiting to feel something or at least a little
different. But, all I can say is . . . it's the day after 1999. It is all
very anti-climatic! But 1999 was a very powerful year if I really think
about it. What a year 1999 was for me! I really made great strides in my
career and in my life. I recorded my song, "Boy Called Sue" and finally
finished, "The Storybook" to my liking. It all worked out so well. It was
almost as if God was rewarding me, by helping me find the right musicians and
more money for Storybook . . . all because I was brave enough to record Boy
Called Sue. I knew that the song would raise a great deal of controversy and
I guess I am ready to be out in the open with my life so I can help others
deal with theirs.
I turned 30 this year! That was a kick! (We went to Spago's in Hollywood to
celebrate) I am glad my 20's are gone. It has been a rocky 10 years to say
the least. Now I feel more refined and capable to handle the life God gave
me. I got my music placed for sale on most the major carriers on the
Internet. Found out about MP3.com and ended up getting thousands and
thousands of fans! Started selling albums! Found out Betty J. Eadie (the
author of my favorite book Embraced by the light) wrote about me in her new
book, The Ripple Effect. The best part of it is she and I have become really
great friends! I got the honor of meeting a legend in the music business . .
. Neil Sedaka. He asked Jamie and I to come visit him in his apartment on
Park Avenue in New York. He is one of the most charming men I have ever met!
It was so surreal meeting him. We walk into his apartment and my music was
playing in the background. He asked me to play Storybook for him and we
ended up singing Love Will Keep Us Together. He was so gracious and kind.
Then when I came home I got the chance to finally meet Betty J. Eadie. She
had come down to Houston to promote her book. We had dinner at Houston's
restaurant and we visited as if we had known one another our whole lives!
(Of course we have 4 to 5 hour power talks on the phone!) But when you meet
in person you have to deal with the energy to exude. What a powerful and
strong spirit she is! I feel so very lucky to know her and be apart of her
|Jan 5th 2000|
I will be leaving my apartment in the Galleria after living here for 4 years.
The time has come to upgrade and be in a more secure environment. As I have
become more successful on the World Wide Web, I have had a few incidences
where I realized that my living circumstance is to out in the open.
The property we are moving to is in River Oaks and is really quite lovely.
It reminds me of something in Miami. It is very secure and has a gate with a
guard to interview all who enter the property. We have a beautiful little
fountain out side our door with a small table besides it and just a few yards
away is a cascading water fall that drains into a wading pool. Palm trees
are all around and we are even next to the clubhouse. In the club house
there is a gym (which is great for me!) SO! I am really looking forward to
this; however, packing is going to be something else! Seeing that I am a
pack rat and can't seem to throw anything away! I am going crazy trying to
figure out what is got to go and what gets to follow. I keep telling myself
. . . less is more! I wonder if it will work? LOL!
|January 10th 2000|
Went to Sound Arts Studio today to tape a segment for the Debra Duncan show.
Gayla A.K.A. "Dr. Styles" is doing a show on millennium makeovers. I need to
do a new cover for my MP3 album so we thought this might be a good tie in to
help promote my brand new site allaboutchristian.com.
The filming went well. Felt a bit funny doing the "shtick" bit. But it's
all for fun! Brian, my engineer at the studio was so funny! He's a great
guy! He was totally flexible and even let the camera film him too. At 2:00
I went to see Benny at Elizabeth Andrew hair salon and we sat around and
drank red wine till "The Dr." was able to show. She was next door at the
mall with Debra Duncan doing last minute Emergency Makeovers. I got my hair
cut and bleached blond. (Yes! I am back to blond folks!) I think it looks
really great! Benny is very talented and has a great eye for what looks
good. His partner at the shop, Sandra is a real sweetheart and has a great
sense of humor. Heide Shultz worked on my make up for the photo shoot which
is to be held directly after the show with Source Studio's main man . . .
Kevin Davis. (He is the guy I use for all my photo work!) We are going to
shoot at a mansion with a beautiful chandelier in the background. It should
look good. The clothes are DKNY . . . stylin! . . . All from Neimans and I
love the boots Dr. Styles picked out for me! I have been informed that the
segment (where I will sing on the show Jan 13th) is only gonna be 2 minutes
at the close of the show. That's a bummer. I hope Debra has me one where I
can do a whole song! I am sure it is gonna be a great show. Emme of E's
Fashion Emergency is going be on the show. Should be fun.
|January 15th, 2000|
Debra Duncan show came and went and I have to say that the bunch that
did the show with were a stellar group of people! There is a woman we call
"The Fabulous Dee Brooks" a woman who is a survivor of breast cancer. (Just
like my Mom who is going on 10 years of remission!) Dee spoke to the women
on the show about the importance of self breast examination. She said that
the Dr.'s mammogram completely missed a growth that was 2 inches in diameter!
She spoke a message for all to heed! (Way to go Ms. Dee!) Gayla Bentley
(a.k.a. "Dr. Styles") and her side kick, "Nurse Accessory" did a stellar job
on the show! I truly believe Emme of fashion emergency was truly impressed!
Emme, I must say is a beautiful woman in person. She came in wearing a long
green robe for the show and had an elegant and graceful attitude. I ended up
singing "Who Built the House of Pain" for the show and it aired for a total
of a minute and a half. Debra told me to keep going after we went off the
air, so I ROCKED the house to the point that Debra and Emme were dancing on
the floor! I got a great response from the audience! One guy even came up
to me to tell me I was a male version of Tina Turner! What a complement! So
for the most part I am glad I did the show. Although, I have to say that
some of the producers on the show were less that personable. I felt like I
was a plucked chicken, getting ready to be boiled! I had to keep telling
myself to stay cool and not show my frustration. It didn't seem to matter
that I had the # 2 record on the Internet. I was treated like a kereoke
singer anyway. Oh well. After taking the clothes off I wore on the show . .
. I dawned the ones for my photo shoot and then called my Mom to get the full
report on how I appeared on the air. She gave me an absolute THUMBS UP! I
arrived an hour later at the mansion we were to use as our backdrop. Wow!
What a house! I was told it was sold for over $10,000,000 dollars! That is
a lot for a house in Houston! The house was full of mirrors, marble floors
and French gold crown molding. Being vacant, the house had an Erie feeling
to it. Kevin Davis and I shot for about an hour and a half and then went and
had a wonderful lunch at La Madeline on Shepard. I dropped off the film with
the folks at Thomas photo lab and then went home to take a nap. On the way,
I got some bad news . . . a call from my best friend Pinque -- who told me
after years of having her name and image, that another PINK is coming in on
the scene! I felt so sorry for my sweet friend. She is a great talent and
deserves to make it after all the hard work she has done! This singer "PINK"
is being played on hit radio in L.A. and has a contract with LaFace/Arista.
Pinque had submitted to Arista and got a letter back from one of the V.P.'s
telling her how great her name and look were. Funny that they forgot all
about my friend Pinque with this new girl arriving on the scene! That is the
business for you! Tomorrow, I fly to Seattle to meet up with my friend Betty
J. Eadie (Author of the Best Selling Book, "Embraced by the Light") and Speak
for her new company, "Onjinjinkta."
|January 20th, 2000|
am back from Seattle! What a wonderful group of people I had the privilege
of working with and meeting at Onjinjinkta Publishing. Each person was a
delight and I felt a strong connection with them all. I am happy to know and
report, that not a single decision is made in that company without a prayer
being said! It is an honest to GOD -- GOD ORIENTED COMPANY! It was
wonderful staying at Betty's house. Her son, Tom (General Manager for her
publishing house) picked me up at the airport. Tom greeted me not really
knowing what I would look like. He joked with me, saying that he half
expected me to come out wearing torn jeans and in a ninja like pose
(referring to my cover to my EP "Remember Me.") We both laughed out loud!
After that, Tom and I were like brothers from that moment on! He and I went
and chatted about Betty in an airport cafe for 45 minutes until we had to
meet Georgia and Michelle (Betty's Press people, who are a mother daughter
team) as they arrived. Georgia is a loving and caring woman that is the
spitting Image of everything I love about my grandmother Nenaw. Both are
Pisces, so that might have a lot to do with it. Nenaw is my Mother's Mother
by the way. Michelle (Georgia's daughter) is also a valiant spirit, very
strong and intelligent. She is pregnant and this will be her first born
child. She also has an adopted son that she possess an abundant amount of
love for. We got to the house and all the lights were off. The city had
just had a wind storm and power lines had been blown down. We arrived with
hundreds of candles burning through out the large house. We were met by
Betty next to her famous "SUN PORCH" (as can be visited on her web site as a
chat room). The house was extremely charming, to say the very least! It had
a warm and homey Victorian feel to it. There were wonderful Indian pictures
and artifacts about the house. Also, there were several shelves of Betty's
books all in different languages. Betty took me on a "candle light tour" of
her house and even showed me her ingenuity of using ice trays (in drawers) to
keep ear rings and other various jewelry in. It was all so well thought out!
She took me into her bathroom and a wonderful tub was before me. She told
me I was free to bathe in it anytime! I went on to meet her wonderful
husband Joe (who is a laugh a minute)! He had a one liner for just about
everything! Then there was Stan. Stan does the web site for Betty and also
was the source to bring to fruition, the wonderful album of music that was
inspired by "Embraced" called, "The Musical Journey." Stan is a wonderful
man. I felt a warm feeling every time he was in the room. I noticed him
looking up at the night sky the first evening and I went back to look at what
he was looking at. Up above us was one of the most glorious "celestial
events" I have ever seen. He and I just looked at it and believed we were
witnessing something divine. The moon shown through a three dimensional
cloud cover unlike anything he or I had ever seen. Stan and I had a
wonderful bonding moment in that event. It seemed as if, it was a gift from
That night about midnight we drove into the city in Tom's truck and had a
bite to eat at a local burger and breakfast joint. We all bunched in around
the table and became family from that moment on. After dinner we drove home
and the lights had been turned back on. Joe closed the evening with a
beautiful prayer. I went up to my room (Betty's home office where she wrote
Awakening Heart and Ripple Effect) and started on the book, Souls Remembrance
by Roy Mills. I had something happen that was astounding. I saw a purple
like aura actually coming from the book! To say the least, I am looking
forward to reading it! The next morning was glorious! The sun was shining
and I strolled around the house eating a chocolate covered doughnut. I felt
like I was home. Betty and I talked that morning and had a wonderful visit.
She had a few phone interviews to do, but then after she was done, we visited
and spoke about spirituality. She spoke about the Indians and how they were
taught not to fear the things of life, but to have respect for all living
things. That really moved me and I will never for get that as long as I
live. I realized how Satan has made the Indian people to be misunderstood so
that they would be removed from power over the planet. They are the true
keepers of the planet, therefor they are a threat to the "prince and the
power of the air." I look forward to researching more about this subject for
my book. I showered and Joe drove Betty and I to her office. I met Jay, her
very good friend and now media representative for her company. Jay has a
great sense of humor and a great heart. He is also a writer and once was
going to be a minister. He met us as we walked over to the pizza parlor
besides the office. Inside I met Peter, a fellow singer on MP3.Com who has
the voice of an Arch Angel! Then I met a really nice guy named Don, who is
new to the company and is working distribution in Betty's warehouse. We all
ate and after I was done . . . I got up and had a quick phone conversation
with Jamie and then we all went back to gather the whole company for a
meeting. I was placed besides Betty at the corner of the board table. Tom
said I was acting in the role of "Joe Black" for the meeting. Joe Black, is
the movie with Brad Pitt and Sir Anthony Hopkins. The meeting was very
exciting. The energy with all of us was a perfect blend. I couldn't contain
myself, as I too, was bursting with ideas! It was then my turn to get up and
do my "MOTIVATIONAL" speaking for the company. I had no clue what I was
going to say . . . so I asked God to lead my words and I think that the right
words came out. I spoke of how I came to know of Betty by reading, "Embraced
by the Light" after being told to do so in a dream by my late
great-grandmother. I spoke about having my writing reprinted in Betty's new
book, "Ripple Effect" in the form of a letter to her and how my life seemed
to take off after that. I then went on to talk about the great team of
talented people I was seeing in front of me and what an honor it was to be
addressing them! At a little past 6 p.m. we ate out at a buffet style
restaurant and then went back to Betty's house to sing around the piano.
Stan played while Peter sang Betty's favorite song, "The impossible Dream."
His voice and the energy created was truly profound. I then got up to play
and sing my song, "The Storybook." Later that night, some of us bunched off
and talked in groups and then wound up sitting in the kitchen eating chips
and dip Betty had laid out for us in a spread. It was a wonderful evening.
Betty, Georgia, Michelle, Stan, Joe and Myself never seem to want to go to
bed. We all enjoyed one another's company so much. Before bed, Betty played
a wonderful CD, "Secret Garden." It had rich and wonderful tones. Betty
said that she had toured with the CD for several months. The next morning
(after only getting no more than 2 hours of sleep) we got up and met in the
kitchen. I took a quick shower, packed up my stuff and soon we were all taking
pictures by the front door. In 40 minutes we arrived back at the office
where Betty opened the meeting with a wonderful word of inspiration. A gift
(left over from Christmas) was then shared from Stan.
One of the gifts, was a peep hole for a door -- that signified Betty offering
the world a glimpse for all who wanted to see the face of God.
We were all moved to tears! Stan's wonderful gift was a fantastic tribute to
Betty and the gift she has given the planet. The meeting progressed with the
same wonderful energy as before and with many wonderful moments included.
Before my time to go, I felt an urge to speak once more to my new friends to
encourage and remind them how special and blessed we all were. It was a
moment of great strength and I can honestly say, I have never felt as
powerful before. I truly felt as if God himself, was in the room and having
me say the words I was speaking. My car came at 3:15 and we all hugged on
another and took pictures outside. The first picture we took -- everyone did
my empowering "fist in the air pose" to surprise me. It was absolutely
hysterical! However, I informed them all they needed A LOT of work! But,
secretly I was so very honored! As I left, I hugged everyone, one more time
and Betty last. I thanked her for reminding me of the man I can and should
always strive to be. I got in the car and looked behind to see everyone
waving good-bye. John was my driver and we spoke of all things spiritual on
the way. In the process of "doing" the airport thing, I met some airline
stewardesses. Most notably Karen and Cheryl. It seemed everyone in my path
was placed there by God to be given a word in due season. It was truly
special. I boarded my plane and as it took off, I got out the CD "The
Musical Journey" given to me from Betty and Stan before I left the office. I
played it and looked out at the night sky with the moon shining on the wings
of the plane. The clouds hung below like silvery pillows and sped by as my
flying carpet sailed away in the air. As the music played in my earphones,
it took me back to my short, but significant stay in Seattle. I had tears in
my eyes. Tears of gratitude and tears of knowing. I would miss my new
friends (my soul family) that I realize now -- I must have known from long
ago. My friends at Onjinjinkta. May God Bless and Keep Them!
|January 25th, 2000|
Besides being up to my elbows in boxes . . . this past week has been
something else. It has taken me a while to adjust to the idea of moving. I
have lived in my present apartment for over 4 years now and finished off my
20's not to mention my single life here. I have lots and lots of great
memories! This apartment has quite a bit of history to it as well. It has
been around since the early 1960's and even our Governor of Texas and
Presidential Hopeful, George Bush, Jr. Lived in this very apartment many
years ago. In fact, as the story goes, his future wife also lived on the
complex at the same time. But, they never met one another until after they
moved off the property. Now that is fate for you.
Speaking of The Bush's . . . (BTW) I was invited to record
and sing the official song for the Houston Livestock
and Rodeo this year. The Rodeo is a big deal here in Houston! Former
President George Bush has also recorded his voice "speaking" on the song
during the songs introduction and bridge. The song is called, "Hometown
Hero's" and was written by Peggy Neff and Ken Bujnoch. It's really a good
song. I guess I will find out in a couple of days if my version of the song
is gonna fly with the Rodeo Officials or not. I recorded a rough draft of
the song and pretty much nailed it. It is a rock sounding vocal
--a lot more edgy that I normally do. I liked it.
Oh . . . THE MOVE! Ahahahahhaaa! I am totally procrastinating packing the
boxes. I guess it is because deep down, I really hate to leave
here. This has been a great home for me and if it
weren't for the fact that this place is falling apart and my
growing need for security . . . I would stay. I guess of all the memories I
have of this apartment . . . most will be of my best friend (the singer)
"Pinque." She just lived a few doors down and EVERYDAY was a party! She
would come over after work (she was a leasing agent for the complex we both
lived in) and I would have the house all cleaned and a can of coke, with a
straw, waiting for her in the fridge. We would sit on my blue couch and just
talk for hours and hours! I would go over to my piano and play for her or we
would watch our favorite movie, "To Wong Foo Thanks For Everything Julie
At midnight we would decide where we would go to eat. Sometimes it was our
favorite, "Chuy's" or we would do a late nighter and by 3 a.m. we would end up at IHOP
and sit there at our special booth till 7 a.m. till she had to go to work the
next morning! I don't know how she did it! We would laugh and joke about
how she would go into the restroom to nap for 15 minutes or so . . . and then
laugh even harder as she would impersonate her coworker banging on the door.
Life with Pinque has always been FUN and it has NEVER been BORING! We always
have something to talk about whether it is photo shoots or famous people or
movies or music. Pinque and I love nothing more than calling out our TOP 20
favorites of anything . . . The conversations are always lively. Pinque and
I have had our famous misunderstandings too. But we make up as soon as the
fight looks ridiculous. People must think we are crazy. Maybe we are. She
moved away to LA on January 5th (My Grandmothers Birthday) in 1998. I will
never forget her driving off with our other best friend Cello and another
friend of mine Todd. Hollywood Bound. Jamie and I waved them out of site.
Now I visit her for weeks or a month at a time in West Hollywood or I fly her
down here. In fact she is supposed to be coming down to record her new
single, "Temptation" sometime in March and after that, we are going to the
SXSW music conference together. I met Jamie on October 4th, 1997. We
eventually moved in here together over a year later. Me, Pinque, Cello and
Jamie became the POOH tribe and each of our personalities fit the characters
with tremendous accuracy. I am POOH cause I hate to exercise, am always on a
diet cause I LOVE to eat! And . . . I am happiest when I am surrounded by my
dear friends. Pinque is Piglet. Cello is E'ore and Jamie is Tigger! I am
going to leave up my Four prints -- The 4 Season's of Poohville up until the
last moment I live here at this apartment. That's how nostalgic I am!
|February 5th 2000|
we are moving. I am surrounded by boxes and chaos. It seems as if it
will never end. I must admit, there is something magical about moving though
. . . It is a time of "potential" renewal. I was thinking to myself as I was
moving boxes, that this would be the 5th time I have moved since I have been
on my own. It took me back to the first night I stayed all by my self in my
new apartment 13 years ago. I was 17 and it was January 3rd, 1987. I
remember the great feeling of freedom. I was reading in an old journal that
when I went to the grocery store that day, I bought over $67.00 worth of junk
food! I will never forget pushing that cart around and filling it with
anything that was absolutely and positively TERRIBLE for me! I laugh as I
think of it now. What a rebel! Nothing has changed. OK -- now I buy
WHOLESOME food . . . but I can promise you that there is SOME junk food in
|February 10th 2000|
I have had a bad tooth all week long. I went and saw my friend Mark Bartosh
who is also my dentist and he thought it may be a bad filling. He was on his
way to Geneva for 10 days, so he removed the old filling and put in a
temporary one till he could get back. I have never had such mouth pain. I
ate a small bowl of ice cream and I had to go to bed cause the pain was so
massive after! I guess I will need to get a root canal! So, as you can
imagine -- I have not gotten much done by way of UNPACKING! My house is in
such disarray that I can barley find the phone! Jamie has done quite a bit
of the unpacking . . . but I still need to sort everything out. I hope to
have it done before the end of the month! Oh by the way -- I got a call from
Jay at Onjinjinkta publishing (Betty J. Eadie's Publishing company) They are
planning a show on Oprah. I may end up being in one of the segments. That
would be so great! I am ONE of the MANY RIPPLES that came from her first
book "Embraced By The Light." I would be featured on the show because of
what I have been able to accomplish since I have been aware of Betty and her
|February 14 & 15, 2000|
Everybody! Happy Valentine's Day! I have been getting quite a bit of
e mail about my dear friend, BETTY J. EADIE since I last wrote about my visit
with her in Seattle. As I have said before, I had the great honor of having
some of my writing printed in her latest book and "GIFT" to this planet, "The
Ripple Effect." Some of that writing can be found on pages 175 to 177. I
can't tell you what an honor and a privilege it has been knowing and LOVING
Betty J. Eadie! She is honestly one of the most WONDERFUL and inspiring
human beings I have ever met! Be sure to be on the look out as -- All About
Christian.com [TM] features Betty on of its Featured Artist(s) Page. I have
been so very blessed by the presence of her writings in my own life! In
fact, every couple of weeks, I love to get out her books on AUDIO tape and
play them while I work in the house or am traveling to performances in the
car or on an airplane. I even play them while I am taking a break from
recording my vocals in the studio! Betty's voice is just as moving, as her
spirit led writing! I cannot recommend to you enough, the immense power of
Betty J. Eadie's voice on tape! Let me tell you . . . It is certainly MUSIC
to my ears! One of my favorite things, is to meet and talk to complete
strangers who love Betty as much as I do! In fact, it is startling just how
often this happens and just many of us that are out there! Often times --
when I am doing a LIVE radio show promoting my record, I will talk to the
callers during commercial break and we will talk about Betty and the impact
her life story has made on the world. I talked to an airline stewardess
(during my whole trip on the plane) about Betty, I even spoke about Betty
with a lovely young woman named Lemya, who leased me my new apartment, (she
had recently read Embraced By The Light after losing her precious Mother). A
dear friend, fan and fellow singer on MP3.com named Christine E has even
started her own BETTY BOOK CLUB . . . A gathering, where everyone sits down
and reads Betty's books together! Isn't that a great idea?!!
What a LADY Betty J. Eadie is! And her WEBSITE www.embracedbythelight.com
. . . WOW! It is one of my absolute favorite haunts on the web! Stan, the
webmaster, is just BRILLIANT in his way of presenting Betty's loving heart.
If Leeston hadn't come along, I would have had him do my site for sure. Did
you know, Stan is also one of the contributing writers on Betty's Full-length
Music CD? It is a MUST in your music collection and happens to be one of MY
all time favorites! I hope you guys reading this . . . will drop him a line
at the site to tell him what a great job he is doing! Also, I am in the
middle of reading Onjinjinkta's latest release, by Roy Mills called, "Soul's
Remembrance." I am really enjoying reading this book and applaud everyone at
Betty's publishing company for their efforts in releasing it! By the way --
There is a link on Betty's site about a young girl named Christin Cosby. She
gave up her life while trying to save her brothers dog, Zack from being
killed on a highway. It is a moving story and the website is very touching
-- I recommend that everyone go and see it. The link is
http://www.angelfire.com/la2/OurAngel/ChristinCosby.html My most sincere
condolences to her friends and family. OK Everybody -- as my dear friend
Betty say's . . . RIPPLE ON! (And of course to Betty -- if you should read
this) . . . I LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU my W. N. Girl!!!! (xxxxoooxoxoxoxoxox!)
|February 20, 2000|
am in the process of making some decisions in my life and career direction
that have prompted some out loud realization. In my heart -- I have
always had a kind of "KNOWING" that I received inspiration from God
to seek and reveal truth. To creatively and artistically influence others
to go about life and conquer the difficult situations that come with
it. I feel very led to address many issues that I know some would be
hesitant to address. I feel (for me) that in my practice of spirituality,
it is imperative to throw light where there may be darkness. Most who
have not "grown up" in the illusion of their fear, become like children
-- afraid of the dark. My goal is to use LOVE (whenever possible) to
turn the light BACK ON.
BOY CALLED SUE was a song that was certainly God inspired. The song addresses the issue of a man who is in love with another man and he has decided to be open with a friend about his true feelings. Fearing rejection, he finds love and acceptance instead. Many sit and fear a potentially disappointing out come, once their truth is told. Many miss out on the LOVE others are willing to share and build with another different from themselves. Yes, there are some who will chose judgment or condemnation over understanding, but often we forget that we may be used as a catalyst to bring about a change of heart. Most likely when one makes a quick negative judgment, it comes from a deep seated fear of "the unknown" within. I constantly hear from people that they had negative feelings toward sexually diverse people, until they actually knew one. After having some time for observation, it was often noted that the fact of the diversity mattered very little. A positive out come can happen rather quickly, or it may take time. Either way, hope for the positive should NEVER be lost. NO MATTER THE CIRCUMSTANCE. Too much focus is placed on the aspect of rejection, which gives birth to fear. Fear freezes us in place and makes us ineffective in our own lives. Therefore, courage is a mandatory part of living. I often wonder, if our creator doesn't instantly put situations in our path, in order to encourage us to be more courageous. I hope BOY CALLED SUE helped inspire many to be more courageous. I receive letters on a weekly basis from others telling me what the song did for them and I feel so incredibly blessed and honored to have been apart of making this happen. My recording of that song (in my eyes) remains one of my most outstanding accomplishments to this date. Those who chose to face the dilemma of any kind of "coming out" are brave souls. They deserve compassion and open arms, that only close to embrace.
|April 14, 2000|
As some of you might have noticed the Journal came to a stand still in February . . . Well, as it turned out, my web master Leeston Simms and I decided to part ways over creative differences. I want to thank him for all his efforts and wish him the best of luck. I am excited that the web site will now be continued by the brilliant and multi-talented Stan Zenk. Stan also does the web site for Betty J. Eadie and Onjinjinkta publishing. (Embracedbythelight.com) Stan is an accomplished writer and musician and his contributions have been numerous in the literary world. He is one of the composers of one of my all-time favorite CD's "Embraced by the light -- The Musical Journey" He and I are planning to collaborate on a book thru this spring and summer and we may end up working on a musical together. I can't wait to see what we come up with!
I had a few events happen over the past month, one of them being that I was nominated for a GLAMA for my song EVERYBODY ELSE in the category of BEST CONTEMPORARY SPIRITUAL SONG. I was surprised at this nomination. There are some great people nominated with me, such as the mother of contemporary GLBT Christian music Marsha Stevens. It feels strange to be competing for the same award. To be honest, I don't really mind if I win or not. Just being nominated is good enough for me.
Jamie and I fly to New York April 24th for the awards presentation and we will spend the rest of April on the East coast visiting friends and family.
I have written some new songs that I plan on producing with Recording Artist/Producer Chris Rampey. You can hear his songs at MP3.com/ChrisRampey -- I may add one of the songs we produce to my new album, if we can get it done in time. I am thinking that the songs we work on together will end up on an EP that I will promote to the Inspirational/Christian market. Also, I am hoping to release The Storybook Album this summer and do a promotion tour with it this fall.
The rest of this year should keep me pretty busy! I am glad. I like to be productive and the idea of sitting around my house watching my plants grow does NOT thrill me! LOL~!
Tomorrow (the 15th) is my Mother's 53rd Birthday. Eleven years ago, she was diagnosed with Cancer and has lived to this point. I am so very grateful to God for this gift and I know how lucky I am. I think of my many dear friends who are without their Mothers on the planet and I pay tribute to them and in honor of my Mother's birthday . . . I think of them and wish that the spirit of their Mother's would visit them and lovingly hug them and warm their hearts.
OK -- Stay tuned for new developments on this site, weekly journal entries and career happenings. Thanks for hanging with me during this time of transition.
|April 20, 2000|
| Well, 3 days and
counting till the GLAMA'S. It will be broadcast live on
7pm eastern -- so try to listen in if you can. And . . . if you are
reading this after the fact, most likely their will be an archived version
of the awards show on the site or at GLAMA.com . . . I am starting to
get excited about the trip. There will be lots of friends I will be
playing catch up with including my friend Jon Leavitt (who by the way
has an awesome radio station up on MP3.com called "STONEWALL" -- enter
in that name in the search and take a look! He has over 56 OUT/GLBT
PRO artists ** including moi! He has worked very hard to get that thing
the way it looks now and has done a great job!)
I will be having lunch with friend singer/songwriter Neil Sedaka the day after the awards. He is always so much fun. Jamie and I will do some shopping, we will fit in some meetings here and there with industry folk and then on Wednesday we are bound for Providence by Train. I love taking the train. I love to look out and watch the country side go by. Last time I rode on the train from New York . . . I did over 200 Christmas cards all by hand! (I don't know if I can keep that up this year folks!) Jamie's Mom -- (My other Mom) will pick us up and the moment I walk through her door . . . I want some hot dog stew! (now I know that may sound funny, I winced when I first heard of it . . . but it is SOOOOO GOOD! That lady can cook! Let me tell you! And she keeps me so busy -- I don't have time to gain weight! When she stayed with me and Jamie last summer -- she would knock on my door exactly a minute before 9 AM every morning and say, "Your not gonna sleep ALL DAY now are you??" LOL~! -- I LOST 5 POUNDS! Who needs a fat farm with her around!!! She is a diebitic and is the MOST amazing woman. You would never know she ever had a problem, until "a problem occurs." She has the constitution of an AMAZON! I just ADORE her! She's putting a pond in her back yard, as we speak . . . WOW~!
I will be seeing my friend and singer on (MP3.com) Christine E in Boston. This woman could fuel a medium sized city, EASILY with all her pazazz! Some of you might remember, she was my fan of the month for February. She so wonderful! She even sends me a box FULL of vitamins, to make sure I stay up to par with my busy life! Hey guys! How is that for a caring friend? I haven't been to Boston since 1996 and while I was there last, I was finishing the instrumental track for LOVE WILL KEEP US TOGETHER. Which will be out soon everybody! (I am waiting on an INTERNATIONAL license from Harry Fox Agency.) Boston is a very special city for me. I have such great memories!
OK -- Talk to you next week . . .
|April 26, 2000|
Hello, Hello, Hello!
I am writing from Somerset, Massachusetts. Jamie and I just got in from New York and I am happy to report that we had a fabulous time!
Well to start everything off, I am happy to announce that I DID END UP WINNING THE GLAMA! WOW! To be honest I was NOT expecting to. The other nominee's were all so fantastic! AND . . . ALL SUCH WONDERFUL people. I got the opportunity to get to know some of them and I was so very touched! The Brilliant and Profound Jeanie, The Charming and Grace Oriented Lee Ellis and "Voice from Heaven" David North. Of course the Legendary Mother of Contemporary Christian Music, Marsha Stevens was right beside me too! What an amazing talented bunch of people! I still can not believe that I was chosen from such a honorable bunch! If I could have brought them all up with me, I would have. I am looking forward to (and hoping I will be lucky enough) to work with all of them in the near future.
When my name was called, I was in shock . . . I had no speech prepared . . . but somehow, the words came out. I grabbed the podium and held forth! Before the award was announced, it occured to me that I had better make some notes on a napkin (just in case) . . . well, when my name was called I crumpled it into an absolute mess! LOL~! You can go hear the awards on GAYBC.com listen right here if you have RealAudio G2 or higher. The program is 4 hours long. I came in somewhere around 2 hours 31 minutes. After I accepted my award, I got ushered into a press room filled with reporters from all walks of life. It was exciting answering all their questions and trying to think quickly to give them good answers.
There was so much to that evening, that it is all a blur now. But one thing I can tell you is . . . just wait -- Your going to be hearing names like Casey Collins, Michael Holland, Sonia, Barnes, Mary Gauthier and SO many more for years to come! Casey Collins -- I have to tell you . . . could very well be pop music's very next sensation. WOW! What a voice! He sounds like Annie Lennox with an attitude! Meeting him was an experience!
Later after the awards Jamie, Marsha Stevens and myself decided to call it a night and go get some late night chow at the Tick, Tock Cafe besides our hotel, "The New Yorker." We had a wonderful time. The next day I spoke to my friend Neil Sedaka, who was treating me to lunch at one of the best places I have ever eaten, called MICHAEL'S! What a joint! Neil was sitting there waiting for us. What a wonderful man he is! I am happy to announce that he and I have decided to do some work together and record a duet! We are going to cover one of my all time favorite songs (that he wrote) "SOLITAIRE." This song was made famous originally by Neil (off his album, SEDAKA IS BACK) and went on to be covered by The Carpenters and Elvis. I am so excited about this, I cannot even begin to describe the feeling! We hope to begin production in June.
Before we were done eating, I had the opportunity to meet and talk with Glenn Close. I gave her my only copy of my STORYBOOK album that I had with me here, on the East Coast. She has been such an inspiration to me.
Well, I could go on and on. But, I will end with -- LIFE IS GOOD and so is GOD!
All My Love!
|May 15, 2000|
|Hello to Everyone, from the West Coast! Sorry it
has taken me so long to write, but I am in Placerville, California working
on my book! It has been keeping me quite busy and it's coming along
nicely. The book is going to be a collection of stories from my life
in a biographical kind of structure, but other than just giving a glimpse
into my past, it I will illustrate several of my spiritual awakenings,
as I had them.
I will share many of the things I learned when I had a kind of near death experience in 1994. The book will be very funny sometimes giving an honest look at me in my "little boy years" and others times it will have it's serious moments. In the book I hope to impart revelation that has helped me get through as I have continued my journey here on Earth.
Writing a book is not as easy as I had once thought. It's not that I have writers block or anything like that, it's that I often have to decide what I want to share and what I want to keep private that holds me back. No matter what, a lot of me and who I am is going to be in this book and I hope that it will be both entertaining and informative. So far the working title of the book is, "It's a God thing!" (And a God thing it is!)
I am planning on starting a lecture/speaking engagement tour this winter, after I record an audio tape of yet another project I have in the works. The audio tape series will be sold on this website, starting sometime in the fall. The working title to the audio tape series is, The Return to Paradise (Finding your path - back to the Spiritual Self) On this tape will be an original song (by me) called, "Waiting for Paradise" and then my spoken word in a 30 minute conversation format will follow. This is to be originally released on cassette. I am excited doing this project because helping people get back in touch with the God in them is something close to my heart! My friends and loved ones have been after me for years to do this kind of a project. Hopefully, this will lead to more in the future.
And . . . Yes! The retail version of my album, "THE STORYBOOK" is STILL COMING OUT! The hold up is the duet I am to record with Neil Sedaka. I want to put that on this album. Whew! I have a lot to do! It's kinda over whelming! But I love to work! OK -- That's it for now.
|June 18, 2000|
Happy Fathers Day!
|July 21, 2000|
Well, TODAY is
my . . . (ahem) . . . Birthday! And . . . exactly 31 years ago MAN
LANDED ON THE MOON! I remember the days where I used to wake up early
and watch the clock hit the very minute I was born . . . which was
7:21 a.m. BTW.) Now, I just hope to get up by noon! LOL! Anyway .
. . I am finding that I am turning into one of those people that DREADS
the day more than appreciating it! I still have this child like anticipation
that the day is going to be absolutely fantastic! Well, the reality
is . . . I can't have a cake, cause I'm on a diet . . . I wouldn't
be able to blow out the candles anyway, cause I'm still out of breath
from my 5 mile run! Also, the present I want . . . won't fit in a
9" x 12" box . . . cause the present I have in mind would be a in
15' x 7' box. (I want a Mercedes!) We could still put a bow around
it! (shrugs!) Oh well . . .
|October 1, 2000|
Hello everyone . . . Here is an update as to what has been going
on with me. Actually, there have been many wonderful revelations that
have come to me and you will read about some of the major ones below.
The "God By Storm" idea has so far merged into becoming a tour idea, that will most likely result in several songs that will end up becoming an album. "God by Storm" is going to be a tour of artists for God from all walks of life. Singing for and about God. Like a "Lillith Fair" or "Woodstock" music event. There is even a man that is interested in getting us a bus and a major music booking agent has told us of her interest. This is still very much in the planning stage . . . So stay tuned!
OK . . . The biggest thing that I have happening, is God directing me to put together a real Ministry. Yes, you heard me right. A ministry that I am sure will keep going strong LONG after I leave this planet. In fact the way I see it. I am 31 now. By the time I am, oh say around . . . 40 the vision I have should be in FULL swing. I need a lot of prayer and support for what you are about to read. And if you feel led to tell me anything, email me and please know that I am completely open to your views.
I keep having visions of an actual Cathedral. In my visions I see a very beautiful woman, who has the face of a china doll. ( I intently believe that she is either an angel or one of my guides.) She shows me the outside of a tall white massive building with a statue of Christ (with his arms extended out) at the very top of the building. Below on the ground (before you enter the building) there are many plaques of Gold that contain scripture. She opens the door and then leads me into a foyer made completely of white marble, and in the foyer there is a moving body of water that flows into the end of a beautiful sanctuary. Before I pass through huge brown mahogany doors that lead into the sanctuary, I see a beautiful life size portrait of Jesus in an incredible ornate gold frame. In fact, as I looked further down the foyer, I saw other framed pictures but could not make out who they were.
The sanctuary is quite large just like a cathedral, made of glass, white marble and has many TV cameras in it. In my vision I follow the beautiful woman up to an accention and next to a podium that is all made completely of crystal. There is lighting below it and it gives off the most beautiful glowing effect. There are colorful flowers everywhere. The back drop of the back of the building is a deep royal blue color lined with silver and gold. Another body of water is flowing toward the very back and leads to a lovely fountain that is underlit with many muti-colored lights. Above the fountain I see written boldly in Gold -- "CHRIST IS THE WAY, THE TRUTH AND THE LIFE" "WHO EVER FOLLOWS HIM SHALL SEE LIFE AND NOT PARISH" and written beside the fountain . . . WHO EVER DRINKS FROM MY WELL, WILL NEVER THIRST AGAIN."
As I am mesmerized looking at all this . . . I notice that my guide is gone and also notice as I look down at myself, that I am wearing a long white robe, lined with blue and gold. I turn around to face the sanctuary and the whole building is packed with people. Suddenly there is a man in front of me with a TV camera going 3 . . . 2 . . . (holds one finger out and points at the red light on the camera now going on). When I come out of the vision I feel strong that there is a world wide audience watching me.
Soon after I started having these visions friends and family started to tell me that they were having visions, dreams and premonitions about me. Most of them saying they see me wearing all white in large groups of people. The interesting thing is most of these friends and family are not the ones I would expect to be telling me this. It's really been quite something. Even my mother keeps telling me that she is seeing something wonderful come from me and it is not human. She says that she has no doubt it is of God. She says that the Lord has been leading her to pray more for me to obtain the desires of my heart.
I see this Cathedral as a building that is centered around the teaching ministry of Jesus Christ, just with a more modern spiritualistic and universal approach. Taking not only the teachings of Christ, but the teachings of other teachers and evolved spirits this world has known. However, there will be NO DOUBT in this building that Jesus Christ is the KING OF KINGS and LORD OF LORDS. The teaching in the building will be dedicated to the expansion of the soul. To bring deeper Truth and Peace into all of our lives. I see this building as being a new millennial church. I want this to be a place where ALL people, from ALL walks of life gather together and encourage one another to utilize their own HOLY SPIRITS and to think and make life choices for themselves. A place where anyone can come and not be judged or condemned for their lives or views. I see it be a place where elders sit around (like the time of the rabbinical priests) who discussed the meaning behind scripture. I even see a news letter posted to the web site of their discussions.
Now, I don't see myself as being the only person who ministers there. Actually I see myself maybe only speaking and or singing a few times a month after the Cathedral is in full motion. I will be the head minister (until God leads me to hand that role to someone else). And it will be the head minister that will retain the authority to say who goes or does not (yet) go before the congregation and the cameras. The Cathedral is a place where people like Marianne Williamson, Deepak Choprah, Betty Eadie, Joyce Meyer and other great spiritual speakers, musicians, evangelists and many others that God has called to major or private ministry (that do not necessarily have a visual audience) have a place to debut their Ministry, books, CD's and other teaching aids. I see this as being a building where anyone from Billy Graham to the Dali Lama could come to speak (after I come before him to the congregation saying "brothers and sisters in the name of Christ, let us lend our ear to our brother and hear what he has to say.")
There will be an Online store and even a live feed (that will be archived) showing the services over the Internet. I see this being broadcast all over the world on cable and radio. Jamie has had a vision of all of this and is even going back to school to learn about web site design and the new flash technologies to construct the Cathedral's web site.
Now. How am I going to start funding this? There will be many ways, but the one that I can personally see to now, is another vision. God has had me organize a special body of music that I have been progressively been writing over the years. It is going to be a phenomenal 9 song album of powerful Christ centered music I call, "ALL THE TIME." These songs are some of my very best original work and ready to go. I am in the process of gathering the people I will work with to do production and looking for the funding needed. I will use every dollar of the money I raise from this album to start building the Cathedral. I have written all the songs myself, so my part can go directly to the fund. Imagine If I sold 3 to 5 million albums (over the next few years) at $12.99 (which is very possible). I would raise over 30 to 40 million dollars (minus distribution and tax charges). Yes, I know that is a heavy duty number, but I believe that if you do a thing for God you do it in the biggest way you know how! Luckily, there are will also be other artists and projects that will be donating to this building, so I don't feel the weight of the responsibility entirely.
The Cathedral will be fully functional and equipped with a full state of the art broadcasting production studio. Also, I see a publishing house and distribution arm that will be set. God will be fully glorified in this house and I will spend the rest of my life seeing that this becomes a reality.
(After taking a break) I have started working on the book again, I am also working on the audio tape series. Again, the funds from this will go toward the building of the Cathedral. I am attending my first pastors conference in October on the 24th thru the 27th and am looking into all the legalities of getting licensed as a minister. At first when this started I almost ran off to seminary . .. But I felt God pull at the back of my shirt and say "HOLD ON!" And after I have had many pray for me about this issue, I feel comfortably led to study from home. I have decided that it is my HOLY SPIRIT that will give me my instructions and I have starting to study for hours and hours everyday. I know God is in the process of sending many to assist and support me in this wonderful and honorable undertaking. Please pray for me that my vision and ability will sharpen to make this manifest. To those of you who feel led to support me, please come forward and know that I invite any of you to join me in this dream. We are all the children of God and all of us will be a stone that builds this structure.
In the name of God and all that is good,
|October 24th 2000|
Dr. Rembert Truluck --
-- is one of those great men of God that is on the cutting edge of
redefining what the world sees as Christianity. He has scripturally
proven (using the original languages that the Bible was written in)
and shown that many of the "clobber passages on homosexuality" are
either falsely transcribed or are missing important grammatical components
needed to properly display the correct translation. He has a web site
that has ministered to millions and a book called, "Steps to
Recovery from Bible Abuse" that is healing many in their misconceptions
due to biblical scripture. As one who is a sexually diverse man and
a Christian, I highly recommend it. I get Dr. Truluck's news letters
regularly and I wanted to pass this one along pertaining to a letter
he received from a Dad, being overjoyed due to his own sons acceptance
of him despite social prejudices of today. It is my belief Dr. Truluck
is breaking strong holds of bondage. Bondages of hate that others
feel led to impose on others due to false doctrine and social practice
AND PRAISE GOD FOR THAT "GOOD NEWS!"